morethanthis

”Okay no need to panic.” Skrattade han.

”I think there is.” Inflikade Zayn i samtalet.

Harry tittade upp från brevet han ännu inte hunnit börja läsa och jag uppfattade rädsla i hans blick. Zayns ord gjorde honom uppenbart ängslig och han gjorde inget försök till att dölja det. Jag la en hand på hans axel. Då kände jag hur hans kropp darrade. Det var inte lätt att uppfatta, men svaga skakningar nådde nerverna i mina fingrar och fick min egen hand att darra lite smått den också.

”Just read it please.”

I don’t know which one of you will find the letter first, but you’re all going to read it so hello everyone. First of all I want to tell you there’s nothing to worry about. Take a deep, calming breath and keep reading the letter.

You know about that girl I told you about? Victoria? It might sound cheesy, but I haven’t been able to keep her off my mind ever since we got back the States. She’s all that I can think about. You don’t even know who she is, because you never met her. Well except for you Liam, you saw her for a brief second when you came running along the beach to tell me Emma was missing. But I don’t think you even had a chance to actually greet so, let me tell you all a little about her.

She makes me smile. She makes me laugh. She makes me feel like I actually have a shot of being happy in life. Her deep brown eyes are the most enchanting thing in the entire world. She’s 17 and the most amazing girl I’ve ever had the luck to meet. And you two of course, Emma and Vivi. I love you don’t forget that. Oh, Victoria can also put on the cutest attempt to an Irish accent I’ve heard in my life.

That’s enough on what you have to know about her at the moment I think, I just wanted to draw you a little picture so you don’t imagine her like a blurr.

I see her everytime I close my eyes, so what am I supposed to do? Let her go? Accept the fact that I will never see her again? I let her out of my sight and lost her. I beat myself up about it all the time. Ever noticed that low, pounding noise at night? That’s me banging my head against the wall.

Harry, I know that you out of all people will understand and not think I’m a complete screw up. Well, at least I cross my fingers and hope you don’t. Honestly. What would you have done if Emma had never sat down on your lap by mistake on the subway that day? You would never have gotten her phone number. And you would not be reading this letter with a ring on your finger.

I remember when you came home and skipped into the living room like you were light as a feather. It was a Wednesday, and you didn’t even have the decency to sit on the empty space on the couch next to me. Instead you hopped right into my lap and gave me a hard time to breathe. I tried to push you off me but you wouldn’t cave. Why are you so darn heavy? Ugh. Anyway. You told me about this beautiful girl who had run you over with her bike and landed on your chest. Then you lifted your shirt and showed off a pretty bad bruise. But you didn’t mind. More like the opposite, you smiled like you were proud of it. You described it like she had fallen from heaven right into your arms. I laughed and reminded you she hadn’t landed in your arms at all, and that it didn’t sound like a very smooth catch either. Then you punched my in the chest.

I bet you eight pounds you would’ve done anything to find her again if it hadn’t been for that coincidental, extremily lucky meeting on the tube. Do you have any idea how lucky you are? You’re marrying the girl you’ve always dreamed of. All because you had the courage to ask her to see you again. And that’s exactly what I’m up to. I’m flying to Los Angeles to look for Victoria. She told me she went to Seashell High School and that’s the only clue I’ve got. I really believe I can find her. I should probably let you know that I’m planning on coming home for the wedding, obviously. I wouldn’t miss it for the world. Plus it’s my birthday!

Här hade Niall klottrat ner en sned liten smiley, och något som jag tror skulle föreställa en ballong. Den var ganska oformlig, men det såg ut som en oval med ett böljande streck sammansatt med den, som ett ballongsnöre. Jag kvävde ett skratt och lyckades behålla mitt serious-face.

I’m asking you to not go after me, it’s not needed. I can take care of myself and I’ll be alright. I just can’t stand the thought of that I was sitting simply a heartbeat away from her. Do you have any idea how close we were sat? Our hands were touching and I was about 12 inches away from kissing her. This is my biggest regret and I have to do something about it, or I won’t be able to live with myself. I brought my guitar with me in case you’re wondering why it’s not leaning towards my bed matress like it usually does. I finished the song last night and I’m going to America to sing it for her. Guys, I think I’m in love. She makes me shiver from happiness, yet she’s all across the other side of the Pacific. Imagine if she is sitting in her room right now, brushing her long, brown hair. What if she’s thinking about me. Wait, it’s like 5 am over there, she’s probably asleep. Dammit I’m getting carried away here and I don’t have an eraser on this pencil. Back to topic. If everything goes as planned, she’ll know how I feel about her and hopefully feel the same. If not, well, I’m coming home anyways I can’t stay in the U.S. forever. Cross your fingers and pray for the best, alright lads?

Niall

Åå lilla Niall. Nu vill jag veta vad ni tycker :)))